When you are redt a shidduch, do you feel cool as a cucumber or does your stomach start doing flips? As your relationship progresses, are you running for the hills or ready to talk tachlis? Find out where exactly your dating and relationship skills stand with The Navidaters’ Rate Your Dating Skills quiz. Get a paper and pencil and have fun!
1. You get off the train after a long day of work and your mother texts “Mrs. Schwartz wants to set you up with Yaakov/Shira (You know Yaakov/Shira, the guy/girl everyone is waiting to go out with). You:
a.Text back immediately, “I’m in. Amazing! He/She is a catch and I’m excited to get to know him/her. Hey! You never know. It only takes one person, right? Worst case, I have a nice night out and work on my conversation skills.”
b. Think to yourself, “Yaakov/Shira? He/she will never go for me. What’s the point?”
c. Call a friend, ultra-excited and say “I was just set up with Yaakov/Shira. I just know this is bashert. I have to plan the perfect outfit. I can already see us with our children around the Shabbos table.
d. Think, “What am I going to talk about? My last few dates were a flop. I am so uncomfortable talking to guys/girls.”
2. On a first date, your date is holding your gaze. You:
a. Hold it right back. This is great, we’re making eye contact! This guy/girl knows how to engage with me. Finally!
b. Think, “Is he/she staring at the zit on my chin? Oh no! When will it end?”
c. Ok, Ok, this is it! This is the one! He must be seeing our unborn children in my eyes! Time to start planning the l’chaim. What will I wear? Od yeshama!
d. Think, “I don’t know how to make great eye contact. I wish I could.”
3. You went out on a date with a great guy/girl. You are feeling hopeful yet something isn’t sitting well with you. You always call:
a. Your mother/friend/Rav/Rebbetzin/shadchan/relative. They have amazing advice and have NEVER been wrong yet. They are clear and level headed. I have not one shred of doubt! What would I do without them?
b. Your mother/friend/Rav/Rebbetzin/shadchan/relative. They have amazing advice, but sometimes I feel like though well-intentioned they aren’t completely objective. I wish I could speak to someone objective.
c.I’m in the dating parsha alone. To make a long story short, my parents aren’t very supportive.
d. I am so jaded already. Enough said.
4. You are getting really serious with someone. Strong feelings have developed, but there is something “off” that is gnawing at you. You:
a. Bring it up to your boyfriend/girlfriend. We always communicate about everything. Doesn’t everyone? Hopefully we can see eye to eye. Our relationship is built on honesty, trust and respect.
b. Think to yourself, “I don’t know how to bring this up to him/her. I’ll wait and see and hope the right time finds me.”
c. Think, “If I mention this, it’s over. He/she will definitely dump me.”
d. I knew there would be an issue. There’s always an issue. I’m out of here!
5. You and your significant other are talking about imminent engagement. You’ve met the family several times and you’ve even discussed the ring. You are:
a. Pumped! He/she is the one! This is the happiest time of my life!
b. Waiting for the other shoe to drop. This is too good to be true.
c. Beginning to re-examine the entire relationship. You are not so sure after all.
d. Running for the hills! SOS! What was I thinking?
6. If you had the opportunity to speak with an objective and sensitive dating/relationship coach who could help you debrief after a date, or facilitate healthy communication in your relationship… would you go for it?
a. No! I am 100% confident in my dating/relationship skills. I feel super positive about this time of my life. Everyone surrounding me is supportive. I’m not worried. I’ve got this.
b. Yes. I would be hesitant but open to a free 20 minute consultation.
c. Yes! This is what I have been waiting for. I checked out your website, www.thenavidaters.com and everything from your gentle consultations to the customized packages you offer looks really interesting to me.
Mostly As: You are an A+ dater! Cool, confident, hopeful and enjoying every day! Good for you!
Mostly Bs, Cs or Ds – You have perfectly normal concerns. Maybe you’ve been burned before or are just experiencing legitimate frustration. Do you have access to objective date debriefing or third party date/relationship “intervention?” Maybe you have some unfinished business that is interfering with your dating and relationships. Or maybe you could benefit from practical dating tips and tools. The Navidaters are providing emotional support and empowerment strategies for singles of all stages! You can pop in for one specific issue or be a repeat customer. Whatever works for you! The Navidaters are meeting with clients in Lawrence, NY, via telephone and SKYPE. Whatever your need, we have got you covered!